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More gaming delights for your eyeballs as we take a look at the week’s big news stories and some upcoming fun.




Super MArio's Face


If you needed to fill out your gaming collection and didn’t already own a Nintendo Switch plus the entire Mario Switch back catalogue, this week is a prime opportunity to grab some bargains.

Many of the moustachio’d pipe jumper’s latest titles – including Mario Kart 8 Deluxe, Super Mario Party, Mario Tennis Aces, and Super Mario Odyssey – are included in a cheap bundle with the Switch console from the 10th until 17th March.

The games will also get a price-reduction if bought separately on the store, making this a great chance to fill out your collection.

No word yet on whether we will get a repeat of the glorious reduced-price Super Mario Run deal from last year. For more information, check out the official Nintendo website.


Shenmueeeewwww 3

The fan-adored and long-awaited sequel to the Dreamcast classics Shenmue 3 got a new trailer this week…. and it does not disappoint. Yes, there was some combat on display, which looked all fine and good. Yes, there were glimpses of characters and story to whet your collective appetites, no issue there.




The real joy (for me) came from the amazingly horrific facial animations – which don’t seem to have changed since the initial teaser was released back in August 2017. That was fairly early in development, so having what appeared to be action figures woodenly bark the dialogue was understandable. Now we’re quite far into the development cycle and the facial animation has not improved… at all. The game is due for release this August, so it’s pretty unlikely the faces will improve between now and release. Get ready for some weird-ass expressions…


Here are some of my favourite examples from the new trailer:


This guy – whose mouth seems to be unaware of what the rest of his face is doing


This guy – who folds his entire face into his own chest while talking at you


This poignant line of dialogue delivered with all the emotion of a dishcloth

Girl Power (Up)

This week we celebrated International Women’s Day and got to enjoy the mindless cries of morons asking when we will get an International Men’s Day.

Gaming giants Sony – probably listening to their marketing department who insist that women gamers are a growing market to capture – have commemorated the day with a special PS4 theme.


It’s actually pretty sweet and includes many badass gaming legends from the past few years.

The theme is now available worldwide (and it’s free) so consider giving it a download to spice up your PS4 home screen.

New Shit


A summary of the new releases now, with all their promise of joy and entertainment.


Title Format Publisher Release Date
Don’t Escape: 4 Days in a Wasteland Mac/PC Armor Games 11/03/2019
LEGO Marvel Collection PC/PS4/XO Warner Bros. 12/03/2019
RICO PS4/XO (13th)/NS (14th)/PC (14th) Rising Star Games 12/03/2019
Trüberbrook Mac/PC (NS/PS4/XO 17th April) Headup 12/03/2019
Baba is You Lin/Mac/PC/NS Hempuli 13/03/2019
Golf Peaks NS After Burn Games 14/03/2019
Motorsport Manager NS Curve Digital 14/03/2019
Willowbrooke Post PC Excalibur 14/03/2019
One Piece World Seeker PC/PS4/XO Bandai Namco 15/03/2019
vApe Escape PC Gamechuck 15/03/2019


The Wins (alternative news)

We’ve run out of time before managing to share more details about these other globules of gaming news from this week:

  • Mexican newspaper accidentally publishes fake screenshot for “Pokémon Uzi Killer”
  • Gamers outraged as Sony officially discontinues production of obsolete handheld console (was it the PS La Vida Loca? nope, don’t remember)
  • The Sims management apologise for poor handling of complaints relating to Sim-abuse
  • IGN shocks gamers with article about video gaming
  • The Division 2 will split the game’s launch date – players who pre-ordered the premium edition and download it through UBendPlay will get it first (as long as they were born on a Thursday). Players born in a leap year who pre-ordered the standard edition will get access after that
  • Anthem will soon release patch to prevent PS4 consoles setting on fire during gameplay
  • Detective Pikachu hopes to be the most terrifying CGI game adaptation, Sonic replies with “hold my beer”
  • Steam removes creepy-as-fuck game from the store due to “patently obvious and well-known risks”
  • Sony releases official remote play app for Blackberry devices
  • Pokemon GO is testing new “Witching Hour” raids between 2 and 3am


Matt Tiernan


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